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SPRING CLEANING FOR YOUR DIVORCE

Spring Cleaning for your DivorceIt’s that time of year. The weather is getting warmer, the sun is staying out longer, leaves are growing back on the trees, and flowers are starting to bloom. This is the time of year when magazines and housekeeping gurus like Southern Living and Martha Stewart publish articles to remind us all that it’s time to give our houses a good spring cleaning. These articles contain helpful tips and tricks for making spring cleaning as painless as possible and to get your house looking as good as new. If we spend a little time each year giving our houses a good, old-fashioned scrubbing, why not do the same if you are contemplating separation or divorce? If you have given everything you can to your marriage and have made the decision to separate, then what can be more important than focusing on cleaning out the mess that is standing between you and a sparkling, fresh life? To help you achieve this goal, just follow these common spring cleaning tips:

  1. Get organized. You and your spouse intend to separate or are separated. It can be almost impossible to focus on and determine what the most important issues to deal with are when you try to do too many things at once. Do you work out your child custody schedule first? Do you make sure you have regular financial support coming in? Alimony? Child Support? Is it a monthly battle to decide who is going to pay which family debts or bills? Take a minute to step back and come up with a game plan. By creating a list for what is most important, what issues just can’t wait, and what items can be put on the back-burner, you and your attorney can help you work through your most important issues and reach a resolution on each one instead of just trouble-shooting various smaller issues as they come up without an actual long-term solution.
  2. If you don’t need it, get rid of it. Maybe you’re further along in the separation and divorce process, but there are just a few last things that seem impossible to let go of. . Often a family law client finds that there is something holding them back from finalizing everything even if most of their issues have been resolved. For example, in a custody case, maybe you’ve got the regular parenting schedule set, but you and your ex can’t agree on a summer vacation schedule. Or in your equitable distribution case, which deals with the division of marital assets and debts, you can’t decide on who gets the patio set. Now is the time to take a long look at whether that thing that is holding you back from settling is really worth it. Just like that pair of hot pink boots you haven’t worn in six years, maybe it’s time to just let it go and clear up some space in your closet, and in your life.
  3. Don’t forget the overlooked surfaces. Sometimes we are so focused on the big picture, that we forget the details. Spring cleaning tips encourage you to do things like dust the tops of doorways and move furniture to reach those areas that are often missed in ordinary day-to-day cleaning. So while, for the most part, focusing on the big picture is probably a solid approach, there comes a time to pay attention to those smaller details that can cause a big problem if they are never addressed. For example, if you and your ex have trouble communicating, it’s probably a good idea to spell out the most efficient and effective way to communicate in your parenting agreement or custody order. Clearly define whether you are going to use the children’s swim practice as the exchange point for your change in parenting time or are you just going to meet at the other parent’s house after practice is over. Instead of not knowing how one parent will pay the other child support, including a provision that child support will be paid on the same day each month by direct deposit into the other parent’s account so you aren’t worrying each month about when and how it will be delivered or paid.

With a little bit of spring cleaning, your home can look sparkly and new.  Why shouldn’t your life look and feel the same way?  Take the time to follow these helpful hints and your home won’t be the only thing organized, clean, and ready for this beautiful new season.

Have a question about family law? Unsure of which step to begin your spring cleaning checklist? Give us a call today or fill out our form, we’re here to help.

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RM
Written by

Robin M. Lalley

Principal and Managing Attorney

Without a doubt, there is nothing I care about more than my family. I am adopted, as are my siblings, and so I feel that I have a unique perspective and appreciation for being a part of a supportive, loving family. While my parents have been married for over thirty years and have four children who remain extremely close, we have experienced our ups and downs. Through it all, we have remained a strong family unit, and this is what has gotten us through those difficult times. Practicing Family Law, you deal with people who are usually at the lowest point of their lives. If you are meeting with a Family Law attorney, then your family, whatever that may look like, is in crisis. There is nothing more personal and emotional than this. It is important as a Family Law attorney to be a stable, compassionate advisor and advocate during this very difficult time. Fulfilling that role is what practicing Family Law is all about for me. Practicing Family Law, you deal with people who are usually at the lowest point of their lives. If you are meeting with a Family Law attorney, then your family, whatever that may look like, is in crisis. There is nothing more personal and emotional than this. It is important as a Family Law attorney to be a stable, compassionate advisor and advocate during this very difficult time. Fulfilling that role is what practicing Family Law is all about for me. Upon graduating from the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill School of Law, I accepted a position at a Family Law firm located in downtown Monroe, North Carolina. I was able to dive right into the areas of both Family and Criminal Law. While Criminal Law can be exciting, to me there is nothing more challenging, important, and rewarding than Family Law. Whether it is in the courtroom, at mediation, or in the office, Family Law always offers an opportunity to make a difference in someone’s life. The needs of a Family Law client vary from person to person. It is imperative to be able to fit the role that a particular client needs in a given situation. While one client may need a shoulder to cry on, another may need a strong voice to speak for them, and another may need a calming presence to see them through the situation. However, I truly feel that all clients need guidance to work towards a resolution that allows them to move on to the next stage of their life, whatever that may be.

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